In the giddying months leading up to a wedding, there are whirlpools, waterfalls and wild rapids of emotions rising up inside you. Some are kind of nonsensical (should we pay extra for mini gin and tonics between courses?🤪 ). Some are serious (UMMM… how do I get a marriage licence?). Some of are based on pure faith in humanity (will anyone reeeeally travel all the way to Jerez de la Frontera, just for us? 😬).
No matter what, throughout the process you learn so much about yourself and others. For me, the most useful lessons actually came on the day itself. Eekk!! From not sleeping at all, to partying until 4am that night, here are the most five important life-changing things I took away.
Side note: YES… I know this isn’t strictly related to finance or investment. But sometimes in life you have to take a moment to absorb some big moments. Alsooo… I paid my half of the wedding totally with freelance writing about finance. Could that count…?
1. Zero sleep = ZERO problem 💪
The night before my wedding, I didn’t even sleep for five minutes. Not even one minute actually. It really sucked, because I did everything that I thought would work.
Got up nice and early the day before, and went for a vigorous 12km run at 8:30am.
Completed all the tasks for the day (sort of) calmly.
Even went to bed at a reasonable hour (midnight), with expensive moisturiser, exquisitely flossed teeth, black-out curtains and my ASMR super playlist. A solid 8 hours should have been on the cards.
But I got nothing. NOTHING. Well, not nothing. I flew out of bed at least eight times to go to the toilet. Very, very nervous stomach. Nearly threw up twice. Adjusted the heating. Changed pjs. Forced my eyes back shut. Swallowed sick. A lot. The whole night, my heart was pounding out of me so hard, it was like I could actually taste it. Metallic and sicky. I could definitely hear it, BAMBAM, BAMBAM, BAMBAM. Lucas, meanwhile, slept fine. Jealous!
At 6.30am, I finally accepted defeat, had a hot-ish bath and waited for the day to start. But you know what? Zero sleep made literally zero difference. It turned out to be THE HAPPIEST and most energising day of my whole life. I didn’t stop smiling for a single second. So, if you can’t sleep. It’s really not the end of the world ❤️
2. Prepare for your own weaknesses 🍇
We all have our weird self-sabotaging moments. Mine is that when I am stressed, I don’t eat 😣. Anything. And the day before my wedding was one of those days where I barely ate two bites.
It wasn’t a problem until I was trying to fall asleep when the hunger pains started to hit hard. It’s like your stomach is eating itself, sticking to your spine. This is the moment when I wished so much that I’d thought ahead to put a fruit bowl in my hotel room.
A single banana would have been the difference between me trying to sleep with and without searing hunger pains. I strongly think 300 calories it could have helped me get at least a few hours rest. And I felt so stupid for not forcing myself to calmly have a bowl of soup somewhere beforehand.
I think we all neglect things that could help us sometimes. From now on, I am going to ask every new bride or groom if I can provide a fruit bowl for them in their room! And make sure that I have easy-to-eat healthy snacks around during moments of stress. Lesson unlocked! 🔓
3. You don’t need an army, just banging friends 🙌
Picture the scene. A very exhausted Hannah manically WhatsApps her best friends and family in the early hours of her wedding, to URGENTLY bring a banana. That was the situation. And they did. With gusto. My brother even returned from Jerez market with two kilos of grapes wrapped in paper as well.
I am so, so, so, so, so grateful to the little cluster of besties who didn’t ask questions, they just turned up bearing fruit (literally).
It like was a magic picnic. We even needed to clear a whole table to make room for the mountain of coffees, biscuits, coca-colas, crisps, snickers bars, croissants, cookies and – of course – bananas coming my way.
Around five people in total completely lifted me out of my nerves. They helped me get dressed, forced me to eat something and made the morning so much fun. Lesson: A few good friends will help you through anything! 🙏
4. You lead the vibe 🎷
We had a lot of fun. Like, a lot. There were so many times when I was crying laughing. And when I looked around, everyone else was laughing too. But not just laughing. When we danced, everyone danced. When we jumped, everyone jumped. When we threw out a “cheers!” everyone else did too (!!).
It’s AMAZING how much you can set the tone. You really can seem to shape the overall experience of your guests, just with your own experience. 😆
It made me think that we probably have a bit of that power on ordinary days too. If I walked into Money2020 feeling that happy and confident, perhaps others would catch it too. Or if I laughed more generously in the supermarket, maybe it would change the vibe.
Coming out of the wedding made me realise that our attitude can totally make or break a room. So from now, on I am determined to use my power for good! 🙌
5. Occasions matter – they are bigger than you ❤️
Throughout the day, there were so many magical little moments that are imprinted in my heart forever. An uncle joking around with a flower in his hair. My in-laws starting a conga. Best friends (who’ve never met before) on the floor with my mum for Opps-Upside-Your-Head… to the total bewilderment of Spaniards. Impromptu onstage singing performances from guests. Jerezians discovering Galaxy Minstrels for the first time. My side figuring out how to eat a shell-on shrimp. We’re STILL laughing now at all the fun and silly things.
A wedding is not for everyone. I totally get that. But this experience taught me that celebrating SOMETHING in life (whatever it is) with your people DOES matter.
Bringing your family together does matter. Making a big party for people you love does matter. Seeing all your friends and family turn up for you does matter too. It matters. It matters. It matters. And on that note, turning up for people you love matters. My heart just melts at all my friends and family who made this massive effort (three-day train journeys in some cases) to be there. I still can’t believe how lucky we are.
What is the point, if we don’t have fun sometimes? If you can bring it, you should. Life is too short.
So, when’s the next party…? 😋
My grandma was a BIG party person. A very fun Welsh Londoner, with all the dazzle of the West End and all the unflinching confidence of a fierce Valleys woman. Her parties were obviously banging.
Granny instilled in me the essential importance of a good party from a young age, passed down to her by her own grandma. As she told me, there are always so many reasons in life to be sad, so when you have something to celebrate, you must grab it with both hands. Make a damn party. Or at least, join in someone else’s with a full heart. ❤️
I couldn’t agree more! Find your people and celebrate something with them. That’s my biggest takeaway. It doesn’t have to be the family you were born into. And it doesn’t have to be a traditional celebration. But from time to time, make a party with the people you love! You never know how it could brighten somebody’s life! 🎉
And… who knows, for fintechs it could even be good marketing
… So maybe this blog was relevant after all. 😉
